Monthly Archives: July 2008

Facebook Prank: Why I Suddenly Started Attracting Gay Men

POSTED BY: Bowzer

So one day I’m on my computer doing my usual facebook routine and I get this friend request. I recognized him as a bartender that I had engaged in a drunken conversation with a couple of weeks or so prior. Hey, I’ll be honest, as long as you’re not some random, you’re in my network and I have met you at least once, I will always accept a friend request. This time was no different, and I accepted this guy’s request. Continue reading

Imitation Is The Most Sincere Form of Flattery

POSTED BY: PutUpYourDukes

ESPN = Jealous Thieves

ESPN = JEALOUS THIEVES THAT SWEAT OUR WEBSITE

Hangover, I Want To Kill You

POSTED BY: Bowzer

Take a look at this photograph and study it very carefully. No, I didn’t say stare at her sideboob, I said to study the picture. At first glance, you are probably thinking, “Dear God, that girl must have it pretty bad.” I want to agree with you. She has no shirt on, and is passed out on a table in someone’s backyard with beer bottles strewn all about. The sad thing is that I actually envy her at the moment. How could that be, you ask? Because while she is obviously experiencing a serious hangover, at least she is STILL ASLEEP. Continue reading

Why Bowzer Is Still Single

POSTED BY: PutUpYourDukes

When I saw that Bowzer wrote a post on Why You Should Stay Single, it reminded me of something I found on the interwebs last week. Since we all know that Bowzer is a dinosaur (with a blogging problem), it appears that Mingle2 Blog may have provided a good explanation for why he has no girlfriend. Click the pic to check it out.

Why You Should Stay Single

POSTED BY: Bowzer

First let me just say that this post applies to both men and women, so any examples I give are applicable to both of the sexes. Now what I am going to discuss is a situation that everyone has found themselves in: BEING SINGLE. Some welcome it as a holy gift of liberation, others fear it like some sort of plague. No matter which side of the fence you’re on, we have all been there. Of course when it’s all said and done, most of us will end up in a traditional partnership or marriage. I like to think of being single as a continuously running clock that is counting down to zero. It is a precious, limited commodity in one’s life that should be appreciated to the fullest, while supplies last.

What I would like to discuss with you today is why you should stay single, at least for a little while, before you totally sell out and get into a serious relationship. Continue reading

A Sign That Your City May Have a Homeless Problem

POSTED BY: Bowzer

50,000 Hits in Our First Three Days!

POSTED BY: PutUpYourDukes

There is no way that we could have ever predicted that Put Up Your Dukes would generate over 50,000 hits within three days of putting up our first post! This is largely due to the success of Bowzer’s first post, “The Area Code Rating System.” If you haven’t read it yet, make sure you do so immediately, it’s a gem. Congrats to Bowzer on being our first author to hit the front page of Reddit! We have no one to thank for our budding success but our readers, of course. We have enjoyed hearing your feedback on our stuff thus far, so please keep commenting! We have so many awesome things planned, so be sure to stay tuned as our site continues to grow.

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Andy Dick Wins “Creepiest Celebrity Mug Shot Award”

POSTED BY: PutUpYourDukes

Famous comedian Andy Dick was arrested early Wednesday morning at a Buffalo Wild Wings in Murrieta, California for investigation of sexual battery and drug use. Apparently he was completely wasted and grabbed a 17-year-old girl’s tank top and bra and pulled it down, exposing her breasts. Andy Dick was also in possession of marijuana and Xanax when taken into custody by police.

Andy Dick's Mug Shot

Andy Dick's Mug Shot

Now, look at that mug shot. Maybe it’s just me, but that picture totally looks like a guy that just pulled down a 17-year-old girl’s top. Put Up Your Dukes has officially bestowed the “Creepiest Celebrity Mug Shot Award” upon thee, Andy Dick. You’ve earned it.

Source: FoxNews.com

Confessions of a Schoolteacher

POSTED BY: Bowzer

(Note: This is a post I originally wrote for cVillain, but I thought I would throw it up here for those that haven’t read it yet. To read the other articles I posted there, click here.)

Teaching Survival Pack

Teacher's Survival Pack

Summertime is in full swing, and public school teachers around the country are rejoicing. It is the time of year when we finally look back at the nine and a half months of blood, sweat, and tears, and realize that it was totally worth it. While older teachers have families to attend to during the summer, a younger teacher like myself truly gets to live it up. While my friends have to get up early and go to work on these beautiful summer days, I get to sleep in and do pretty much whatever I want. Many of my friends seem to think that it is unfair that I get paid to do nothing for an entire summer. This is because they don’t quite understand what teachers have to put up with during the school year to earn their time off. While most teachers I know (myself included) love what they do for a living, there are always a few students that will drive even the most composed teacher nuts:

Continue reading

The Area Code Rating System: Why 1-10 Just Isn’t Enough

POSTED BY: Bowzer

I figured I would share a little piece of wisdom that I picked up at the bar this past weekend. I only wish that I could take the credit for such a revolutionary idea, one that I predict will turn the people rating system industry on its axis.

So we’ve all been there, guys and gals. You’re standing there at the bar, and all of the sudden a member of the opposite sex walks in that you have never met. Immediately you turn to your group of friends, and what do you do? Only the most completely superficial thing known to mankind: reduce that person’s aggregate self-worth to a number between 1-10.

Now we all know the inherent problems with the traditional 1-10 rating system. Sure it’s simple, but how do you come up with one number to describe the intricate differences between various people? Surely not all 7’s or 8’s or 9’s are created equal. While some people utilize the decimal system to help with this problem, it just isn’t enough. Now let me introduce you to the area code system. Continue reading